The Brush Turkey That Just Walked Through My Carport Is The Only Creature On Earth Not Hyped About GTA VI: EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW

There’s a brand spanking new trailer for GTA VI out today — a day early — and I’ve found the only creature on earth that seems unaffected by the hype.

Strictly speaking, the trailer for GTA VI wasn’t meant to come out until the early wee hours of tomorrow morning (AEDT), but a leak led to Rockstar Games releasing the full proper trailer early. I’ve written that up myself over at Gizmodo Australia, go have a look here.

Nearly instantly, the Internet was ABLAZE with hype, reactions, reactions to those reactions, memes, analysis and more.

I wanted a different angle. Clearly, I NEEDED a different angle.

And then the sensor in my carport went off, and serendipity delivered unto me the one angle that nobody else was likely to touch today. During the average day, those sensors go off to detect couriers, members of my household coming and going… and a lot of the local wildlife.

Passing through my carport at that moment was a rather fine specimen of the Australian Brush Turkey (Alectura lathami). So I decided that it would be the perfect specimen to get a literal birds-eye perspective on the GTA VI trailer. Here’s my EXCLUSIVE interview.

Alex: Excuse me, sir…? madam…? They…? Hmm, I don’t know. Could I bother you for your reaction to the GTA VI trailer? I mean, clearly you must have watched it by now.

Brush Turkey: Indeterminate honking noises

Alex: Do you feel, for example, that Rockstar has given away too much of the underlying plot in this first trailer?

Brush Turkey: Further honking noises, sounds of it scrabbling through the leaves in my garden.

Alex: I see. What’s your view on the game’s now official 2025 launch date, especially as GTA V came out ten years ago, and megapodes such as yourself typically only live 12 years?

Brush Turkey: Some kind of snuffling noise.

Alex: Do you feel that this is a game that is suitable in any way to the younger elements of the brush turkey community?

Brush Turkey: Alarmed look as it spots me, before fleeing off into the road, presumably to steal a car.

That was, sadly, where our interview concluded due to its rapid disappearance.

Yes, of course this is satire. No Brush Turkeys were harmed during this interview, and I would welcome feedback from the Ibis community if they have views on Nintendo’s next-generation Switch.

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